My conscious friend says he's "tired" of Black American women?

[Bro. Ruler Ra]

me: "Damn...why? Our sisters really need us!!"

my friend: "I've been married twice, once to a Jamaican, and the other is from Ghana. African and West Indian sistahs are more "traditional" in scope when it pertains to raising African families.."

me: "Ok, you just finished your Phd, wrote a book, teach at a historically Black college, married a sister from Ghana (who's family is pretty powerful in Ghana), and in the process of building several libraries in Africa.

my friend: "Yeah my brother, I want you to come to Ghana with me and I will find you a wife. I'm tired of these sistahs here!! I'm tired of the looks, disrespect and wanna be European shit".

me: "Our sisters in America still need us my brother, many of our sistahs just want us to stand up and be men."

my friend: "All of that sounds great, but America, especially Black America is pretty much doomed." "We as a people are pretty much gone!!...our salvation will be on the Afrikan continent".

me: "How does your family feel about all that you've done?"

my friend: "They think I'm crazy!!"

________________________________________________________

I've heard arguments from many of my brothers on why African American men should "marry" continential Afrikan women. Especially those who have spent a considerable amount of time in our motherland. Reasons extend from, how this will help in our "bridging cultural gaps to "Afrikan women except me unconditionally" and "these sisters have less attitude".

Has the "war" on our psyche really come to us having these somewhat "distorted" view of each other? I mean...I expect such statements above from negro males, but not from some of the "most" conscious of us??!?

[Bro. Ruler Ra]

...Then again...there are "degrees" of Consciousness


Yes sir...I agree!!

[Dan Tres Omi]

i agree with Muhammed, actions speack louder than words

[Teek]

Laaawwwdd have mercy, the wicked wheel of misfortune really has worked well on us. I've heard this so many times its really frightening. Ok say your friend is right and all the brother both in the US and Europe go back to the continent or the Caribbean to find themselves wives. What do the sisters who are left behind do? I'm not talking about the weave wearing "don't care about content of character just want content of wallet" sisters but the sisters who work hard on themselves and believe in raising family and are very consciously minded? So basically because your friend had some bad experiences the f the lot of us? Is that really fair or feasible?

[kemetic]

Ase' sista . I have had some bad experiences with my Brothers and I am not going to stop dating them. Most brothers I meeet are so-called Christians, I rarely even meet "conscious" brothers. Which I find many people have different meanings for that word. But anyhoooo, still love my Brothers!

[Minister 8-Ball]

None of us are without some level of scars. However, some of us may be too far gone to inject some common sense into their minds. I heard Ivan Van Sertima once state that some of us are so far gone, in order to correct our minds, it would take two sticks of dynamite (one in each nostril) and blow the slave mind out of his or her head! Now, that's some serious talk, but the point is made.

As for your friend, all you can do is just listen. he's made up his mind. My fear is:

What happens if the continental sister disappoints him? Then what?

It seems he's always looking for flaws as opposed to appreciating the package in its totality. Maybe he was using the wrong criteria in selecting a mate while he was dealing with those women. Hopefully, he'll learn that true peace is internal. No woman can give him that.

[Lee Sullivan]

Dearest,

One thing I've noticed about people who continually look for someone to be in a relationship with is, that they don't take the needed time out to do self-awareness, self-knowledge in other words, "know thy self". They seem to be all too often focusing on the outside of themselves, the other person, but don't want to do the "needed inner-work required", so they simply "change partners", they can't find "the one" because they don't see that "they" are the problem.

It's related to the man who is looking under the street light for his lost key, when asked where did he lose it, he replies in the house. Well why are you looking for it out here, his response, because there is more light out here.

We attract the same people because we are the same person, so even if we go as far as Timbucktoo, looking... until we "start with the person in the mirror" or "make that change" we will end up with the same complaint. Maybe Black women aren't the problem, maybe "his choices" are.

Hotep,

Goddess Lee

[LovingLife]

Sis Lee, I definitely agree with you. Thanks for sharing.

Peace, Love, and Blessings,

LovingLife, everyday!!!

[Goddess IsIs Akkebala]

Beloved Mighty warrior Minister 8-Ball wrote: I heard Ivan Van Sertima once state that some of us are so far gone, in order to correct our minds, it would take two sticks of dynamite (one in each nostril) and blow the slave mind out of his or her head! Now, that's some serious talk, but the point is made.
---------------------------
I agree.

Some need two Psychiatrists, one on each hand to help them cross the street, that is how badly damage most of our people are. It is sad.

I will always have empathy and sympathy for our people who Just do Not Get It.

Divine Loving

I AM still learning

[Goddess IsIs Akkebala]

I do not know why when I go into this certain Supermarket the below song is played often. Just last week, I heard it played while shopping, and I thought it was finish, waiting for the next song to play, and the below song played again.

ARTIST: The Guess Who
TITLE: American Woman


http://www.ourweddingsongs.com/garter-toss-songs/american-woman-lyrics

American woman, stay away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don't come hanging around my door
I don't want to see your face no more
I got more important things to do
Than spend my time growin' old with you
Now woman, stay away
American woman, listen what I say

American woman, get away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don't come knocking around my door
I don't want to see your shadow no more
Colored lights can hypnotize
Sparkle someone else's eyes
Now woman, get away
American woman, listen what I say

American woman, I said get way
American woman, listen what I say
Don't come hanging around my door
Don't want to see your face no more
I don't need your war machines
I don't need your ghetto scenes
Colored lights can hypnotize
Sparkle someone else's eyes
Now woman, get away
American woman, listen what I say
American woman, stay away from me
American woman, mama let me be

I gotta go
I gotta getta away
Think I gotta go
I wanna fly away
I'm gonna leave you woman
I'm gonna leave you woman
I'm gonna leave you woman
I'm gonna leave you woman
Bye bye, bye bye
Bye bye, bye bye
American woman
You're no good for me
I'm no good for you
Looking at you right in the eye
Tell you what I'm gonna do
I'm gonna leave you woman
You know I gotta go
I'm gonna leave you woman
I gotta go
I gotta go

I gotta go
American woman
Yeah
------------------------------------
I dated a Chinese Jamaican many moons ago when he first came over to USA. He mentioned the song above. I asked him did he subscribe to the song above, and he said yes. He was told in Jamacia to stay away from american women.

Divine Loving

[Sobek Kwaku]

Goddess Isis, in retrospect this song was popularized by Lenny Kravitz. He actually made it as a lustful tribute to a certain type of American woman, regardless of race or color. He essentially was praising their lustful and seductive ways while being satirical by stating stay away from me. In a nutshell, he was implying that he finds American women so exotic that he has to stay away for fear of lack of impulse control on his part. The song was all about lust and perversion thus ther term "war machines". The video gives a clear description of his perversive intentions with the American women..

[BLACKWATCH]

We would simply take your associate "my friend" as someone dealing with his personal perceptions rather than this being a systemic issue within the African community.

Re-read what you shared on what was said: His so-called European Academic Passport (Ph.D.) and yet his family thinks he's insane... That for us is the root of his problem. Does his family think he is insane for being a professor? For building libraries in Accra? What is the structure of his family meaning father, mother and siblings and extended family? Is he the only one with an Academic Passport or is he one of many? Is he the only one who is aware of his connection to Africa or are they all philosophically aligned?

What pre-conceptions does his european trained mind have when he interacts with women from the Diaspora? Is he too academic? Does he think his achievements should mean something to a woman who wants to know the man behind the accomplishments? While he is with a sister from the home land, why isn't he at peace at finding a loving dutiful mate instead of lamenting over his fatigue over his experience of Black women in African-America?

From this we speak from some of us who have connected with equally with Africans all over the continent and many here and in the Caribbean and Latin America. Some people we get along with and others we do not. We do not paint a brush over this and say, it is a "come here to find you a wife." We've known as many Americans who married sisters and brothers from the continent and it didn't last. The reasons are the same as Africans from the same cultural backgrounds (American-to-American, Brit-to-Brit, Islanders-to-Islander, and African-to-African)....

[Bro. Ruler Ra]

Well, he doesn't boast about his Phd., he clearly understands what that is all about. He's seriously about the work, has always been about "the work" even before his earned his doctorate.